I saw this one one of my favourite websites: Angry People in Local Newspapers.
This guy made both the Bournemouth and the Dorset Echo under the headline “32 stone man trapped in house for eight years”.
So far so relatively normal but, to quote the website:
At some point in the proceedings, one thing must have led to another, the words “Go on, take yer top off” must have been uttered, and this happened:
The moral, as ever with going topless: only take your top off if the part/the story absolutely demand it. In this case: surely not.